“She wouldn’t want you guys to stop living.”
Spencer turned to look at the older man who he hadn’t heard enter the Blackwell house. Chuck Miller had always been like that, a man who moved around whatever space he was in like a ghost. It was a skill that had made him a great detective, but an even better private investigator. And would’ve made him a sneaky teenager’s nightmare had he decided to have children.
“We haven’t stopped living,” Spencer argued, though he knew the statement sounded weaker than he intended. “Look, I get what you mean, but we’re looking for her. She’s more important than anything else we could or should be doing.”
“You might be going to the station every day, but my contacts tell me that you walk around there like a zombie, one with a very short fuse,” Chuck shook his head, then tipped it toward where Amelia sat on the couch next to Patricia Blackwell.
Their heads were bowed over the notebook Spencer knew held every single lead they’d received via the tipline they’d set up after Jo was taken. Every spare minute of his day was spent chasing the leads that were called in. He’d been all over the state of Washington checking into sightings and blonde women who’d been admitted to the hospital. So far, nothing had panned out.
“Those two though, they barely leave the house. Amelia’s left Blackwell and Cole shuttered for months. Patricia hasn’t been back to the community center in just as long. And Richard’s not much better, but at least he’s retired and not ruining his career.”
Spencer continued to watch the women as he thought about what Chuck had said. Maybe they weren’t living their lives to the fullest, but what the hell did that matter when Jo was out there suffering at the hands of whoever took her?
If she was even still alive. A thought that never failed to send a chill down his spine.
He had to believe that she was still alive and that she’d find a way to save herself if they couldn’t. The alternative was something Spencer couldn’t even fathom, and he knew none of the others could either. He turned back to look at the older man and shrugged.
“I don’t know what you want from us, Chuck. Work doesn’t seem all that important while Jo is out there somewhere.”
“I’m not saying you should stop looking for her, just that you can’t let everything else go while you do it. She wouldn’t want you guys to ruin your lives because of her, and she’ll be pissed if she comes home to find out you’ve done just that.”
A gasp drew Spencer’s attention back to the couch. Both Amelia and Patty had turned to look at them, their gaze moving between himself and Chuck. He had no idea that they’d been talking loud enough for either woman to hear them, but apparently they had, which pissed Spencer off. Neither woman deserved to deal with the guilt trip Chuck’s comments brought on.
“Shit. She’s gonna be so mad at me,” Amelia said as she fell back against the couch cushion behind her then ran a hand over her face.
“What are you guys talking about?” Patty asked as she looked from Chuck to Amelia then over to Spencer. Before he could answer, Amelia did.
“I’ve let the business suffer while we’ve been looking for her. If she comes back to find that I’ve failed to keep her baby open she’s going to be pissed.”
“She’ll understand,” Patty tried to assure Amelia, but she didn’t sound all that convinced herself.
“Sure, she’ll pretend to understand but she lives for Blackwell and Cole. If I run it into the ground while she’s gone, what will she have when she comes back? God only knows what’s being done to her, what she’s being forced to go through. I…we…need to do everything we can to keep things as normal as possible for when she gets back.”
“I…I didn’t even think about that.”
“None of us did. Though, I don’t think we should beat ourselves up over it. We did what we had to do, and I wouldn’t hesitate to do it again,” Spencer admitted. “But Chuck’s right. It’s been two months, we can’t keep on like this.”
“Are you saying we should shut down the tipline?” Patty asked.
“No, not at all, but I don’t think we should spend every waking moment focused on it. Amelia needs to reopen the business, hire a new investigator and administrative assistant like she and Jo had been planning to do before all this happened. You and I need to go back to the community center. I need to apologize to poor Ellie and the other kids. We can still monitor the tipline and chase the leads, but we have to do it while also returning to some semblance of normal. She’ll expect that when she gets back.”
Patty sighed. “I don’t know if I can go back to business as normal while my baby girl is missing. I don’t think I have the strength.”
“Neither do I, but Jo would,” Amelia said, taking the words right out of Spencer’s mouth. “She’d work her ass off for us and anyone else she could help in the meantime. We have to figure out how to do the same.”
Chuck pushed away from the door jam he’d been leaning against and walked into the living room. “I don’t have to go home anytime soon, so I’ll stick around and help as long as I can. Amelia, I’ve got a friend who is a damn good PI. She just moved back to Washington and is looking to settle into a new firm. I can send her your way for an interview if you want.”
Amelia nodded. “That would be great. If she comes with the Chuck Miller stamp of approval then she’s definitely worth talking to.”
“This won’t be easy, but it will be worth it. We’ll find her, and when we do, she’ll have a safe place to land.”
“One that feels a hell of a lot more like her old normal than things do now,” Spencer added as he stepped into the living room as well.
He looked around at the family that wasn’t his by blood but had become his by chance. They were going through something that none of them could imagine, but that felt uncomfortably familiar for Spencer. But unlike what happened in his past, this time there was still hope, and they were all clinging to it like a life preserver. He just had to make sure that he didn’t let that hope take them all down in the end.
Author Paris Hansen 